Rachel Connolly

Rachel Connolly argues that modern weddings have become increasingly extravagant, destination-based and focused on spectacle, creating heightened emotions and conflict over invitations and costs. Despite her ambivalence about marriage and Catholic tradition, she values weddings for the flirting, dancing, people-watching and unpredictable behavior they inspire. She concludes that memorable celebrations do not require lavish venues such as French castles, although she would still happily accept an invitation to one.

Loneliness influencers present solitary lives through highly curated routines of cosy interiors, self-care and passive entertainment. The problem is not temporary solitude or even friendlessness, which can follow ordinary life changes, but the defeatist idea that social isolation should be accepted and aestheticised rather than challenged. More active responses—meeting strangers, joining clubs, volunteering or developing demanding interests—could help people reconnect, while influencer culture’s bland, secluded aesthetic already encourages retreat from real-world social life.

Rachel Connolly humorously argues that punctuality should not be treated as an absolute rule of good manners. She suggests arriving late in specific situations—such as visiting an inexperienced host, meeting an anxious date or new mother, ending a relationship, or collecting a pet for rehoming—when the delay may give others time to prepare, calm down or say goodbye. She concludes that etiquette should be guided by what another person actually needs rather than by rigid conventions.

Rachel Connolly critiques the viral concept of the “performative male,” arguing that men who adopt feminist or socially conscious aesthetics to appear attractive are not uniquely deceptive. She observes that performative righteousness affects women and men alike, while online dating experts often turn vague traits into supposedly authoritative red flags that encourage anxiety and suspicion. Although some men may be insincere or toxic, she argues that judging everyone by their tote bags, books or matcha risks rejecting decent people and avoiding the inevitable vulnerability involved in relationships.

Rachel Connolly argues that declining birth rates and greater acceptance of childfree lifestyles should not lead to hostility toward children in public spaces. While acknowledging disruptive behavior by some children and the pressures faced by pubs and other businesses, she criticizes the growing tendency to tut, mutter, or ban families. She maintains that children are part of community life, that women should not be expected to remain isolated at home, and that welcoming families benefits society as a whole.

Rachel Connolly humorously reflects on George Clooney’s claim that he and Amal Clooney have never argued during their 11-year marriage. She contrasts the Clooneys’ wealth, beauty and privileged lifestyle with the ordinary frustrations that fuel arguments for most couples, arguing that disagreements can be productive when they address issues such as household chores without intimidation or cruelty. She advises standing firmly by one’s understanding of basic facts, recognizing when recurring conflicts are unlikely to change, making red lines clear and leaving when they are crossed.

Rachel Connolly examines the rise of “heteropessimism,” a social-media discourse in which women express disappointment with men while treating unsatisfying heterosexual relationships as inevitable. She argues that trends such as “boysober” and self-partnering are more empowering than passive resignation, and cautions that online declarations are performative rather than reliable measures of private beliefs. Using the film Companion and Shon Faye’s Love in Exile, she criticizes simplistic portrayals of gender relations and calls for more flexible expectations around romance, friendship, sex, emotional intimacy and monogamy.

Rachel Connolly gives a largely favorable assessment of Disney+’s adaptation of Patrick Radden Keefe’s Say Nothing, praising its Belfast acting and refusal to airbrush the complex history of the Troubles. The series follows Jean McConville’s abduction and murder alongside the lives of IRA activists Dolours and Marian Price, Gerry Adams and Brendan Hughes. Connolly criticizes its omission of loyalist paramilitaries and its stylized depiction of the Price sisters, but argues that it usefully foregrounds the discrimination, gerrymandering and class conflict that helped trigger the conflict rather than reducing it to a dispute over national identity. She also warns that the drama should not be treated as a definitive history lesson or that political language should substitute for sustained engagement.

Rachel Connolly argues that apps and platforms such as Taskrabbit, HelloFresh and grocery-delivery services encourage people to outsource ordinary activities that can provide enjoyment, accomplishment and human contact. She questions whether these services genuinely save time, noting their cost, delivery problems and opaque customer-service systems, while observing that people often still find time for social-media scrolling. Although convenience platforms can help disabled people and overworked households, their benefits may be least accessible to those with limited money. Connolly concludes that she prefers the effort and immediacy of errands, repairs, cooking and DIY to a supposedly frictionless digital lifestyle.

Lighthouse Immersive’s bankruptcy and planned reduction from roughly 20 cities to five are presented as evidence that audiences are tiring of immersive Van Gogh-style exhibitions. The exhibitions project reproductions of famous paintings onto gallery walls without displaying originals, while charging relatively high ticket prices. The argument is that these shows offer a commercially packaged shortcut to the emotional power of great art, undermine artists’ creative choices and rely on recognizable names rather than genuine engagement. Appreciation of art, Connolly contends, does not require expensive technology or formal education.

Rachel Connolly rejects the idea that she and fellow Belfast novelist Michael Magee are literary rivals simply because their debut novels were published in the same year. She argues that writers are better served by mutual support and promotion than by competing for scarce attention, while the real challenges are low book-buying levels and an unsupportive publishing industry. After reading Magee’s acclaimed novel Close to Home, Connolly befriended him, turning a manufactured rivalry into a late-night drinking and writing friendship.

Rachel Connolly criticizes the Oxford English Dictionary’s decision to select “goblin mode” as its 2022 word of the year through a public vote. She argues that the phrase is rarely used in ordinary conversation, that the limited voting options make the result unrepresentative, and that the selection appears designed to generate publicity. Connolly contrasts the decision with the OED’s earlier practice of having staff choose the word and calls for a return to a more formal, authoritative approach.

Joan Didion’s estate sale generated extraordinary prices, including $27,000 for her Celine sunglasses, $26,000 for a stack of favourite books and $60,000 for her writing desk. The sale illustrates how admirers seek proximity to a mythologised author through her possessions, while also reflecting nostalgia for an era when writing and glamour seemed intertwined. The deeper motivation, Connolly argues, may be wealthy buyers’ desire to signal culture and seriousness by acquiring objects associated with literary substance.

Cemeteries offer a vivid way to understand local history, social values and changing ideas about identity, work and legacy. Visiting graves in places such as Highgate and Milan reveals the industries, ambitions and relationships that shaped earlier eras, while the grave of travelling menagerie founder George Wombwell evokes how unusual experiences once felt before photography became ubiquitous. Personal inscriptions, including Alexander Litvinenko’s, also show how people try to express the irreplaceable significance of an individual life.

Abortion access in Britain is uneven, particularly for second-trimester care in Scotland and Northern Ireland. No Scottish health board provides abortion care through the 24-week legal limit, forcing some patients to travel as far as Bournemouth, while Northern Ireland has failed to commission comprehensive services despite decriminalisation in 2019. Travel creates financial, logistical and psychological burdens, especially for later and medically complex abortions, and gaps in official information allow anti-choice groups to misrepresent themselves as medical providers. The article argues that abortion care should not depend on a postcode lottery or be restricted to cases deemed morally acceptable by an assumed abortion hierarchy.

Social media encourages people to connect unrelated events and treat them as interchangeable, producing false equivalences between incidents such as Will Smith’s Oscars slap, Harvey Weinstein’s abuse, the invasion of Ukraine and life in a supposed “failed state.” This pattern-seeking behavior, amplified by the uniform formats of online platforms, collapses distinctions between serious and trivial experiences, weakens the meaning of words such as violence and harm, and may insulate users from confronting the emotional weight of war, suicide and sexual assault.

Influencers increasingly use low-risk expressions of social justice as part of their personal brands, especially when those positions attract mainstream approval or commercial opportunities. Rachel Connolly contrasts Molly-Mae Hague’s controversial individualistic comments with Lucy Moon’s progressive messaging in an Uber campaign, arguing that both reveal the superficiality and contradictions of influencer culture. The article contends that activism centered on safe causes and easily marketable gestures avoids issues involving genuine risk, while corporations use influencers’ progressive identities to soften criticism of labor and safety problems. This branding-driven politics reflects, and reinforces, a broader risk-averse culture that rewards blandness over originality, expertise and courage.

Dating apps have separated romantic and sexual encounters from shared social networks, reducing the social consequences of ghosting, dishonesty and other strange or hostile behavior. Drawing on Marie Bergström’s book The New Laws of Love, the piece argues that online dating has privatized intimacy rather than delivered sexual liberation, with women often using apps to avoid judgment while still navigating conservative expectations about female sexuality. The author also notes that dating-app interactions are increasingly exposed to public scrutiny through social-media screenshot accounts, creating a different kind of social pressure.

Succession is praised for portraying the wealthy Roy family with unsettling realism, political cynicism and moral complexity rather than relying on obvious lessons about privilege. The White Lotus and the Gossip Girl remake are criticized for reducing similar material to self-congratulatory, moralistic satire that lets viewers feel superior to rich characters. The piece argues that cruelty and complicity are not confined to the ultra-rich or to particular identity groups, and suggests that Logan Roy is compelling because he openly embraces wealth, power and ruthlessness instead of performing progressive self-awareness.

High-street fashion is portrayed as increasingly bland, derivative and repetitive, with retailers offering large quantities of near-identical basics and recycled trends rather than genuine innovation. Rachel Connolly argues that risk aversion, rapid copying, corporate sameness and consumer culture have produced a market that offers the appearance of limitless choice without meaningful variety. The industry’s environmental damage, exploitation and waste are especially troubling because its products are also aesthetically joyless. The resulting dissatisfaction is helping drive many younger UK women toward secondhand platforms such as Depop.